I suppose I could say today was a dream come true. Ever
since Tam and I bought the hat shop, I’ve thought about what it would be like
to have my parents visit. Of course, the “visit” part changed when I realized
they could no longer live on their own and we ended up moving them here. That’s
when it became more nightmare than anything else.
But back to the dream part…
There are places here on the coast that I find charming and
I wanted to share them, especially with my mom, because I knew she would
appreciate their intrinsic value and their artistic place in the universe.
Being an artist, I knew she really would get it, and the thought of connecting
over something so simple, yet complex, thrilled me.
Of course, things haven’t gone all that smoothly with the
move. There have been moments when I honestly thought I wouldn’t survive the
transition. Their behavior has been deplorable and not unlike toddlers who have
been cheated out of too many naps. Except these toddlers have a driver’s license
and a vehicle. Not a good combination.
Pardon my digression into hell.
Today I decided it would be a good idea to drag my mother
around for a little while. She would ask to go to the hat shop on numerous
occasions and then back out at the last minute. Finally the weekend arrived and
I told her I was going to take her there. She was surprised, almost as if she
wasn’t sure the place actually existed. Then she warmed up to the idea. When
the day came, I was all ready to go, but first I wanted to show her a beautiful
iron gate, complete with stone lions. I have no idea what is behind the gate,
but it’s cool and I thought she’d like to see it.
Off we went, and all was going along smoothly, when I took a
quick detour to a place called Oysterville. She’d been there many years ago,
although she no longer remembers. We drove through the tiny lanes and bought
oysters to bring back for dinner. She thought it was lovely and enjoyed every
bit of it. We talked about the lovely clouds and how the sunlight looked on the
water. She commented on the shades of green across the bay and how lovely it
all was.
Then we headed out for the gate, and when we found it, she
was duly impressed, even if she wasn’t sure exactly what she was supposed to be
looking at. I admit, I missed the gate the first time through, so our angle on
the way back wasn’t the best, but she saw it and liked it.
After that, we dropped the oysters off at the house, and she
said she was going to get out. I reminded her she was coming with me to the shop.
For a moment, I thought she was going to balk, but she decided to be a good
sport and stayed in the car.
As we drove into town, we talked about Pop losing his way
over and over again and we shared our concerns. I marveled at how, despite her
failing memory, her direction sense is spot on. It was like that every damn
time, even when I turned corners and took detours. The arterial road turned
this way and that, yet, even though she is (and always will be) unfamiliar with
the area, she knew immediately which direction we were heading.
I babbled our way past the gas station, and ignored the
blinking gas light. We toured past the second gas station, knowing that I drive
a Prius and I’ll make it the short distance from the shop to the station, even
if I have to run on battery the whole way. I was having too much fun. It was
exactly how I’d always wanted it to be.
After we arrived in the parking lot, we slowly made our way
down the street to the hat shop. The sidewalk was a little crowded and I
worried that she would become confused or frightened, but she was a champ and
she finally stood before the shop in person.
I can’t fully express what that meant to me. I’d talked to
my folks about it so many times, and I even showed them pictures and a video,
but that’s never the same thing as being there, and I really wanted her to see
it in person. Today was that day. She took her time perusing the displays, and
checking out the merchandise. She wandered around and watched the customers.
Finally, she got tired and sat herself in the chair we have near the back of
the shop, put there for weary customers.
She watched Tam and I work the store. She got to see us chat
with patrons, make suggestions for hats, and interact with a number of people.
She saw how we do business, and that is something I’d always wanted to share
with her. I wanted her to know that the shop is real, it’s a grown-up place. I
always felt in the back of my mind that she wasn’t sure it was anything other
than a pipe dream and would dissolve in the mists of morning.
Mom has finally seen the shop in person. We toured part of
the peninsula together and I got to share some of my favorite places with her.
There is still a lot to see and many more outings I want to experience with my
parents. And now, I have some hope. It happened when we pulled into a parking
lot and saw that it was the trailhead to a birding path. She said, “I’m not up
to it now, but I think that’s something I’d like to do later on.”
That was the first time she indicated that she has a future
here. This is the first day I haven’t felt like I was on the edge of disaster.
And that, dear readers, is a dream come true.
